What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Make Nazis afraid again!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

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Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

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Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

How do you say "have fun" in French?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

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Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What are the cities in England, UK that have trams?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

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Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Do you believe that the portrayal of smoking in films and music videos contributes to the glamorization of cigarettes in society?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Aut explicabo sapiente quis consequuntur fuga consectetur fugit.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

TEXT:

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why do flat Earthers run away like whipped dogs with their tails between their legs when asked simple questions that expose their delusions as fantasy?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

What do people usually do when they wake up at 5:00 am?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

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Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority